Being short guy dating dating site for older women searching for younger men
What’s interesting about my client, Alexis, is that she had it wrong when it comes to her attitude about short men.All this time, she’d told herself that she didn’t like short men because she simply wasn’t sexually attracted to them; in fact, the real reason she wasn’t attracted to short men was because she had a fixed image in her mind of what a man should look and act like as a result of her upbringing, and she needed the men she seeks out romantically to fit the same exact image of the men in her family. I spend more hours than you’d believe trying to help men and women change the type of person to whom they’re sexually attracted. The first step is to dig deep and ask yourself what in your history makes you attracted to a certain type, as well as what in your history repels you from a certain type.Men and women both fall prey to the (remarkably persistent) myth that sexual attraction works on auto-pilot, as if we are all preprogrammed to be attracted to the ones who captivate our attention. The type of person you’re attracted to depends largely on your beliefs. My client, Alexis, comes from the most machismo family I can imagine, full of firefighters, Marines, and gobs of Old Spice. In Alexis’ family, she was the only daughter and the men in her family were brawny and tough.She is one of my clients who has never dated a short man, and she has no intention to ever date one.The studies confirm that dating as a short guy is hard mode.Simply put, there are very few couples where the woman is taller. What this means is that guys who are shorter than average have a much more limited pool of women to date at the start than their taller brethren.It sucks knowing that a genetic factor over which you have no control can disqualify you from the start! But, getting dates isn’t impossible for short guys. I have had success in dating and relationships (yes, even Tinder) and I’m going to share my tips.
If you must vent, do it around guy friends or with your therapist.Here are a few examples of confidence boosting activities: get fit, take on leadership positions, dress better, take up a valuable hobby (like becoming a musician), or learn the martial arts. So, be confident and proud of who you are, but don’t emphasize your lack of height either. Every smart person emphasizes the traits that others prefer. It’s why a well-endowed woman might wear a tighter shirt, but won’t draw attention to her ugly nose.Wear shoes with a heel, avoid clothes that make you look shorter (like pleated pants).You might even want to consider buying lifts to put in your shoes when you go out.However, only add about an inch or less, especially if you plan on taking them off around a girl or even friends. A good response to short related comments would be “it’s not really about my height, but how awesome I am” or “Most women I date don’t even care.” If she laments that she usually dates tall guys, I always like this reply: “You’re a little (older, younger, taller, shorter) than I usually date, but I’m willing to see what happens.” Above all, you need amused mastery in every situation.
She insists, “I’m just not attracted to them.” Alexis is a smart woman, and she is also a nice person, even though her attitudes about short men are actually pretty patronizing and dismissive.